Young kids who go through "favorite" phases are normal, normal, normal. And for all kinds of reasons. It's a phase and it will pass.

You feeling a bit hurt and shut out by it is also normal. But it sounds like the degree to which you are feeling distressed by this is amplified by past trauma.

The solution to this has nothing to do with your child. I strongly enourage you to seek out some counseling. Talking thru your current feelings and your past history can help you gain some stablizing perspective. That will be the best gift you can give your daughter.

One of the most important parts of parenting is dealing with our own emotional bagage. We are all loaded with it, and children are really, really good at showing it to us. (Ya know. Just in case we hadn't noticed.)

Listen to the experienced parents and professionals who are telling you that this is just a phase and will pass. Recognize that your husband is gonna get exhausted by this and will need some support too. Plan how to deal with it together. Recognize that your emotional reaction is magnified by your past. I suspect that shame and judgement is coming from the past. Get some help sorting thru it all.

It may take great courage to talk with a counselor about your mother's suicide. But parenthood is all about courage. Again and again we come back to the tought stuff for those we love.

Take care and hang in there!